Top Ten Ways to Not T-Off Your English Teacher in a Paper
10. Spell her/his name right, and at minimum, remember her/his name.
9. Learn the difference between “weather” and “whether.”
8. Actually use a font that is readable. “Lucida Hand” does not count.
7. Eliminate all “text” language. “R” is not a word, and neither is “U.” These are what we call letters.
6. Don’t moralize with statements like “It made me who I am today.” Really, nothing is that simple.
5. Remember that spell check is only as smart as you are. “Definitely” and “defiantly” are not the same word.
4. Understand that a semicolon is not just something you “sprinkle” over a paper to make yourself look smarter.
3. Double-space. How else can I make wise and insightful comments between your words?
2. Eliminate Wikipedia. Really, do I need to explain this?
1. Refer to an author/celebrity/politician by his/her last name. Unless you dine at the White House regularly, “Barack” is probably a little casual. If you know him that well, you should probably call him “Barry.”
