I’m Not Good At This
Last week, a friend sent me $50 for no reason whatsoever. Just $50, there in my Paypal account. A gift, he said. I cried. That $50 bought me groceries for a month. 
I am terrible at asking for help. It’s a pride thing. Somewhere in me – despite what I believe about other people – there is this deep belief that I should be able to do this on my own. Maybe it comes from years of having to do a lot of things on my own; maybe it’s a sense of independence that I feel like I need to exert as a woman; maybe it’s just plain, simple embarrassment that I can’t do this without help. I’m not sure. But it’s there, and it’s wrong.
The thing is that we all need help from time to time.I know that’s true, for other people, and every time I am able, I help. I love helping people, and I don’t judge them or pity them or look down on them when I do. In fact, I usually say something about “strength made perfect in weakness,” and I believe it. Deeply.
Just not for me, I guess.
But here’s the thing. I need help. I need gifts like the one my friend sent. I need gifts like my friend Kathy coming to visit this weekend or my friend Lynn suggesting clients for my coaching business. I need my dad’s help to put in stairs and help me build a barn. I need you to read this post and comment on it or share it. I don’t just want these things; I need them.
So today, I need to ask for your help. I need to get more clients for my classes and tutoring. I need more folks who would like help with holiday letters or resumes or book manuscripts or business materials. I need more coaching clients. (I’ll be launching a new coaching program for writers next week.) So please, if you know someone who might be interested, I would be so grateful if you would share these services with them. These are the things that pay my bills, and so any help you can give would be amazing.
I also would love your help in spreading the word about the Etsy shop I run. Crocheting and cross-stitch are my quiet releases just as quilting was for my mom. After a day of words and mental puzzling, the roteness of these activities soothes me, and so I make things. Crocheted animals. Cross-stitched samplers. And I take orders. So if you are looking for one-of-a-kind, handmade gifts for the holidays, I would be grateful for your business. It will help fund the farm projects that we need to do – like build a barn and install fencing.
Thank you for reading my blog. Thank you for supporting me in all the ways you do – from the likes, to the shares, to the tweets, to the emails, to the comments, to the gifts. You are precious to me.
How are you about asking for help? Can I help you in some way?